Episode Transcript
Speaker 0 00:00:00 My son heard me tell the principle that I'm a poor single father. My son was probably 11, 12 years old, about to go in the adolescent, but he's starting to come into the knowing of kind of life
Speaker 2 00:00:16 Consciousness. Yeah.
Speaker 0 00:00:18 Poor this generation of kids, hearing that they're poor. We stand in a one bedroom apartment. Me, him and his sister, I'm sleeping on the floor. The sister in the bed, he owned the couch. I'm getting food stamps and disability and I'm driving a good time van, that my son was ashamed to get dropped off in school then. So I'm in here talking to this principal, really wanting to cry, man, cuz I'm, I'm financially messed up. But she heard me, me and my son. When we got to the car, my son looked at me and said, dad, are we really poor TURs in his eye? I couldn't even look at it, but I made myself look at it. I said, yeah, mijo,
Speaker 2 00:01:21 Controversy, love, hate, extremism and kids. How do we balance all this? On my friend Charleston White has his own battles. He has his own ideas, but here he shares something extremely human and honest. And we talk about kids and our plight to help kids and mentor kids and stop the reciprocity of gang violence in poor neighborhoods. And I think you'll appreciate the candor in which he shares some of his own personal stories. In this interview on the T cast, welcome my friend once again. Charleston White.
Speaker 0 00:02:00 Uh, my brother just came home three days ago from doing 31 years in prison. Oh, for murder. He committed when he was 17 years old. Congratulations. Uh, man. 20 something years. I never heard my brother even mention God. And we got a God friend, mother. I ain't even know if that nigga believed in God. Uh, so I knew he would never be free if he couldn't find a way to develop some remorse. And, and, and that's between you and God. That has nothing to do with nobody, ain't got nothing to do with you, with the parole board or nothing. That's between you. That's like what you did, you just, just between you and God. Mm-hmm. <affirmative>, uh, remorse and empathy. So I knew he would never come home, uh, if he didn't develop it. Uh, my mother, she said that
Speaker 0 00:02:50 In this life, we overcome everything by the power of our testimony because the power of your testimony gives me power. How you got through this, I, I learned in, in group sessions. And as a kid going through therapy, they used to make us relate. That's how, that's how they would gauge us. That's how they would grade us in, in our group participations. Can you relate to these other kids? Your mom left you when you was fired. Charles. Im Tay. Tell him something. Hey, look out Jose, you, your uncle molested you say George, y'all. So they would make the ones who had similar backgrounds relate to one another's story. That's where they strength came from. Mm-hmm. <affirmative>
Speaker 2 00:03:37 Not alone.
Speaker 0 00:03:38 You're not alone. So we would, when he's telling his life story and he would start crying, you'd be compelled to put your hand on his shoulder. Man. It's all right, man. I, man, listen homie, I, I understand too. I felt the same way when my daddy left. The God next to him said, man, uh, I can't say I understand, man. But, uh, I just know. So nobody's doing that to the kids. So the kids growing up angry. If we don't do that to the kids, then they emotions automatically internalizes and they blame themselves. Whether that's divorce or, and if they don't have a outlet, then now they angry. At least with an outlet on the football field. You can hit, you can punch the bag, you can shoot, you can, JB you can work without that. And most kids don't have it. Uh, you start punching your little sister, kicking holes in the wall, walking by hitting your grand mamamama with the shoulder, making intimidating fists with the teacher. Because in your mind, this is what you wanna do. You just don't have the weight with the hate. Tupac said, when I get my weight up with my hate, I'm gonna pay 'em back when I'm bigger, when I get my weight up with my hate, pay him back when I'm bigger. When he get 15 and he look like a grown man and he realize he can punch somebody and make him bleed and then make him feel good, he gonna be violent.
Speaker 0 00:05:14 So you, you, you, you have to, uh, we've taken our eyes off the kids homie, to argue and squabble over politics and, and religion and, and nationalism. We've taken our eyes off the kids.
Speaker 2 00:05:32 Amen. Amen. Yeah. We're making ourselves look like fools for real. In front of, in front of the kids that are coming out. That's
Speaker 0 00:05:39 Why they don't believe in us anymore. <laugh> shit. They used to believe in us, man. Shit. They don't believe. Yeah. Shit. They think none of us. No shit.
Speaker 2 00:05:45 I think you're doing more for the middle than you, than you think. And maybe you do recognize what you're don't doing for the middle. Cause there's so many of us in populace, but it's almost the only crowd I can go after because I don't have the the skillset that you do to be the chameleon. Right. Well, without somebody called me fake because I would be being fake. Right. Yeah. But there are so many more of us as I try to spread the message also and gather more people that are willing to support this, this plight that we have, right? Yeah. I think there are more of them. They're just less outspoken people because they don't have a platform and where they're supposed to speak out at. Yeah. I mean, everything on the news is sensational. And what we have to say isn't sensational. It's taming, but it's taming is something that everyone can get along dealing with. It doesn't mean it's not exciting. Well, it just,
Speaker 0 00:06:37 Well, that's, that's where I wanna take you back to what mom says the, your testimony. Most kids don't know how cool they parents were when they was kids.
Speaker 2 00:06:49 Oh, for sure. Yeah. They
Speaker 0 00:06:50 Don't have, because for one, we not gonna tell 'em the stories. Right. We ain't gonna let 'em know when we was a complete F up <laugh> complete screw up. We're gonna, we, they're not gonna get the irresponsible us. Right. So that's hidden from him. My son never knew. I I, I served time for murder till he was almost a teenager. My other, my other homeboy, his kids never know. He's been to prison. He got bullet holes. Dad, what's the bullet hole? I've been to war. Hmm. I got another homeboy, my other partner spent almost 30 years in prison for wrongful conviction in Angola. And he's been out for barely a year. But everywhere he go, he's been in there since he was a kid. So his whole life is talking about prison. Mother friend had to tell him, say, man, my kids don't know anything about prison or jail. So could you not talk about that?
Speaker 2 00:07:43 Interesting. At, at a certain age, don't you think it's advantageous to know the truth? I mean, even as a parent, look, the reason why I'm telling you that this is a bad idea is because I experienced the consequences of trying, trying this myself. I believe that always work, but
Speaker 0 00:08:01 Believe, I believe that. Well, because, uh, to start, Bob Ray Sanders did a a a did a big writeup on me. So it's gonna be on the front, front page of the Fort Worth star Telegram.
Speaker 2 00:08:10 You have to text me, man. I'm gonna one.
Speaker 0 00:08:12 So, uh, so, uh, I had to tell my son about it. I ha I had, cause it's gonna be on the front page. And, and I was pretty proud about it. That's
Speaker 2 00:08:20 Awesome.
Speaker 0 00:08:21 Uh, so, so I, I had to tell my son about it. Denny's going to go visit his uncle in prison. Uh, I don't think he ever a taste for jail in prison. But
Speaker 2 00:08:30 Part of that is because he has that context from you. Yeah.
Speaker 0 00:08:34 You've,
Speaker 2 00:08:35 You know, people and you've had experience.
Speaker 0 00:08:37 I've taken em around those people. Yeah. I've let him steal drunk. I let him steal crack head. I, I I take my son to stop six and to the ghetto with me when I do community work. And I let him see these men who normally you wouldn't want your children to see. Uh, my mother hated the fact that I would have my son and my daughter down at the classic lady. My mother hated. Man, why would you take this? Because I, I wanna always let him see you remember such and such, such such is that the kind of man you wanna be. Like, you done seen all these men, son successful g you done seen which pick which one you wanna be like you seen dad. So you done had a variety of, you've been exposed to many, many different kind of men. And that kid been working since he was 12 years old. He won't miss work. He don't hang with a group of guys. Uh, many make me proud.
Speaker 2 00:09:29 That's smart. That's great.
Speaker 0 00:09:30 Make me proud, man. Yeah. So shit makes
Speaker 2 00:09:32 That shit. That should make you proud. Nothing. No, no better accomplishment than seeing your lessons manifest in your kids. Yeah. That's
Speaker 0 00:09:40 Awesome. And, and everybody tell me, man, you. Yeah. So, uh, so that's, I believe every parent should do that because what you overcame gives them a blueprint to figure out to overcome it for them. Yeah. And that you can overcome it. So I believe, uh, we go through th go through things, not necessarily because God allow bad things to happen to us. We go through 'em because God know we're strong enough to get through it because we're gonna go help somebody else get through it. And they don't have the strength. You have the strength that they need. So you was able to get through it because God knew you were strong enough. He couldn't stop the situation because he can't come down here and change it.
Speaker 2 00:10:33 And you're the only one that can testify to that. Cuz the ones that didn't make through it can't testify. Yeah. You know, so that is important.
Speaker 0 00:10:41 So it's a, it's a, it's a lot of, it's a lot of people they're gonna battle with drug addiction to the day they die because of what happened to 'em as children. Not what happened to 'em as adults, not what happened to 'em as adults. Yeah. So
Speaker 2 00:10:59 It's interesting perspective. I used, I used to try to tell my kid, I mean, it's ultimately you would love to think, Hey, I went through this experience and I survived. And it's something that inspires them. But you know, you know as well as I do, sometimes kids have to try it for themselves and figure things out. But I kept saying, yeah, I was a
Speaker 0 00:11:16 Kid. <laugh>, if
Speaker 2 00:11:16 You, if you took like a sci-fi themed movie and said, all right, just how cool would it be if you had an, an opportunity to go back in time and talk to your 12 year old self and give yourself advice and everything else and think of how convincing that would be versus having some old man or dad or whatever. That's, I
Speaker 0 00:11:41 Was a kid till I seen colors. I was about 11 or 12 years old. Uh, I got glimpses of the street life. Uncle Wayne walking through, walking back through <laugh>. He gone.
Speaker 2 00:11:56 Yeah.
Speaker 0 00:11:56 Going over. Ain't beating him house, looking outside the window, seeing two guys like, Hey, y'all get out cold door and it's gone. So I got glimpses of it. I never got to see it. I never got to see the streets until I got grown. I went in the boys' home at 14. I still had to go home before the streetlights went in. My mama didn't play <laugh>. I had to run away from home to go do what my p homeboys did. I couldn't. Yeah. I couldn't steal nothing and come in the house with nothing that my mother didn't buy. Boy, where y'all get that? Where you get that from? That's she was on us. Mm-hmm. <affirmative>. <laugh>. Oh mama. These, these Patrick's shoes Take 'em back right now. Matter of fact, come on. We finna take 'em back right now. <laugh> because she, she not taking, I couldn't, I couldn't sell a Kia of dope and go help my mother pay a rent up. She wouldn't take the money. I would have to pretend like I got a job and, and leave it on, on, on the dresser somewhere for my little sister. But my mama wouldn't take it if she knew I wouldn't have a job.
Speaker 2 00:12:53 That's that integrity. Did. She's sure that she wouldn't go to into politics maybe. No. Is that that's who we need,
Speaker 0 00:12:59 Right? Yeah. Yeah. She might do one term. She, she went to foster care. She went, she went, she went to Lena Pope home, cps PS foster care. So my mother was a foster care parent. Oh, that's awesome. Uh, for 20 something years after she retired from General Motors. Wow. And she got into that, uh, going to go, uh, find my aunt who lost her five kids to the c p s system. So my mom went in and relocated all five of them kids who had been separated, uh, due to my aunt's drug addiction and adopted them, which were her nieces and adopted them. When my mama brought them babies back into the family. My aunt had the strength to get off drugs and change her life completely. And my mother gave her back her kids. There's
Speaker 2 00:13:38 The testimony, there's the strength of her testimony. Yeah. Man, she's a superstar.
Speaker 0 00:13:43 Yeah. That's what her, her prayers is what got me through the foolishness. Uh, I, I rejected everything this woman tried to teach me. I thought she ain't know what the fuck she was talking about, man. That God shit ain't real man. She beat me with everything I put up against her. All of my bullshit, uh, man, she beat me with, with would just let me see her live. What she was trying to preach to me. Mm-hmm. <affirmative>, I never seen a man come outta bedroom. I ain't never seen my mother drunk. I never heard her say nothing bad about my father. I ain't never heard her cuss nobody out. She never, when we was wrong and she went down to the police station, she say, you tell these people the truth. Did you do it? And if you lie, she gonna hit you across your head in front of the police. Yeah. <laugh>. So, uh, man, we were, we was forced. My mother was, she was doing everything in her power. Uh, and then she still had to go to work. So when she went to work, all the shit that she said is counseled out because there's no reinforcement. There's no reinforcement. So she, when she coming home to reinforce she got to go to sleep. <laugh>, she can't whoop her ass and
Speaker 2 00:14:58 Giving you the rope to hang yourself. Yes. Yeah.
Speaker 0 00:15:00 So, but, but she's learning, you know, at this time I remember vividly when the word and the concept tough love began to be spread out in the counseling world. Mama come home with this tough love talk, start saying, no, no, no man, we didn't understand that language. <laugh>. We was bald kids. Uh, but she was growing up too. She was changing and she was seeing that the parenting that she's been doing, trying to give us everything that she didn't had to make up for her not being there for having to work so much. Trying to make life good for us. And we we're unappreciative, we're ungrateful. Yeah. We think she's supposed to do this. And so she's having to take off work to come to court, take off work to enroll us in alternative school. So, uh, we made it difficult for her to have to parent us. I didn't have to do none of that shit, man. Yeah. And I could make good grades and that's all mama required, man. Just go to school and make good grades and good citizenship. Don't bring me no good grave out. No good citizenship. Boy. So I used should pride myself before I got gangster. And having straight e I was a great kid, man.
Speaker 2 00:16:16 That's a great thing to focus on too. At a young age. That's definitely,
Speaker 0 00:16:19 I could pride myself. Yeah. And having ease, excellence. Yes ma'am. That's why I could get out of trouble when I started getting in trouble. <laugh>, I was a charismatic kid with good manners. Yeah. And I can get in front of the judge and, and I can get the probation officer lady by herself and charm her to death until my mama come in and tell her, now listen the boys, you know mama go come in and help everybody. To me <laugh> because she want the best for me. Yeah. She want to make sure this is the best person for me. He
Speaker 2 00:16:47 Wants accountability for you.
Speaker 0 00:16:48 Yeah. So when I go visit my brother, now he's on the leg monitor. He can't leave a house. My brother 49 years old, he left when he was 17. He's 48. About to be 49. He's 17 again with mama boy, she on him right. Boy, he can't leave eye sight. She's watching it at where you going? Who you talking to? Who is this coming to see you Bob Mama. I'm, but she looking over everything.
Speaker 2 00:17:12 He's gotta appreciate her motivation though, man. Yeah. <laugh>, please don't go through that again, man.
Speaker 0 00:17:17 Congratulations
Speaker 2 00:17:18 By the way. That's
Speaker 0 00:17:19 Yeah. Y'all gonna take you to go meet him man. Yeah. You have to go meet him.
Speaker 2 00:17:22 I would love to go meet him. Love to man.
Speaker 0 00:17:25 So, uh, this is what I had to learn as good as mama was. She coulda had daddy there. It still take a village. It still takes a village. When the kids down the street busing bottles and windows and putting tires on flat, it takes somebody say, Hey y'all cut that shit out. Tell your goddamn dad on you. Boy, I don't give a fuck. Don't tell your mama it. You have to correct children.
Speaker 2 00:17:53 Yeah.
Speaker 0 00:17:54 And, and sometime it's not, Hey Jimmy, you guys quit doing that. They run over the teacher, the teacher that can't say, boy, sit your at this jam somewhere. Kind pinch him a little bit in her. You don't stop them. Teachers don't have no problem. The teacher who don't have the waral to reach the kid, pass the rules without breaking the rules in order to connect with the pain. The pain Don't allow the kid to consistently follow rules. Cuz some days I ain't in pain. Some days mama washed clothes and we woke up this morning, I had clean socks, clean underwear. I took a bath last night and I got donuts this morning.
Speaker 0 00:18:40 So I'm soothed for the day. I'm not in pain. Come back tomorrow. Mama and stepdad, it might have been fighting. I fell asleep on the floor. Mama and them came in from the club. I woke up and went and got in the bed. Couldn't go back to sleep. Fell back asleep about five o'clock, woke up late, come to school. My school uniform shirt ain't here. Now I'm in trouble for not having a school uniform shirt. Now I got a smart mouth now I got you see what I'm saying? Yeah. So we punished the kid based on the condition that they coming out of according to who the mom and daddy is. Let the mom and daddy come up there and they seem uneducated, ignorant, cursing the kid gonna take the brunt of that. Well I learned to make it work for my son. I would enroll my son in the school and play like the ignorant black father who don't curl nothing about education. And they helped that boy get all the way through <laugh>. Man, don't give a damn by school. I'm just doing that. I want the boy to drop out to be a dumb mechanic. And then them white, they used look at me crazy in my scum in all white schools. I would play the ignorant nigger father with gold teeth. Don't care. Nothing about nothing coming in there with the coveralls. The long dread acting like I don't care about education. Yeah. But I was using reverse psychology tactics. Yeah.
Speaker 2 00:20:06 Because you would be actually the unicorn. Because these days the principal can't even call home to report anything because they're gonna get such a defensive parent.
Speaker 0 00:20:17 Well those are my relatives. Every time I I, every time I go over relative how they telling me about a junior and got in trouble. Schooling's always a schooling teacher F fault. I said, man, y'all fucking this boy up. No accountability. No
Speaker 2 00:20:28 Kidding. That's man. No
Speaker 0 00:20:30 Accountability.
Speaker 2 00:20:31 It's rampant. It's rampant. They literally feel like they're stuck between a rock and a hard place cuz they can't really report it. They just have to either eat it or make amends in some other way because they know if they call the parents it's gonna be worse. And then they're gonna have to go in front of everyone with their tail race
Speaker 0 00:20:47 For, for the most part. My mother knew we was gonna lie. Yeah. For the most part. I was gonna come home and say, mama, that teacher racist mama, that teacher don't like me. Then that was the line every year,
Speaker 0 00:21:01 Every class. So my mama started knowing her kids. Knowing her kid. Well how do you know your kids? You used to be a lion. Mf <laugh>. You used to steal Joe chromosome. You. When you look at your children and there's something about them that you don't like and you don't displease, just understand they got it from you show chromosome and his chromosomes. So my mama know there's certain things that go come with these two boys. Real if first when they get in trouble, they gonna start out line. Once you go to pressing them with questions and catching, then they'll come out and tell the truth. But I ain't believing nothing off the bat. I start learning that my kids allot of me too. Yeah. I had to learn that my mother loved me way more than I love her. I had to learn that my son don't love me more than I love him. He'll tell me a lot to get outta trouble. <laugh>. Yeah.
Speaker 2 00:22:00 That used to be one of my main rules that I felt like it was effective with my son. If no matter what he did did not matter the extent of the offense. If he didn't lie about it, it'd always be a lesser punishment. And at the time, I, so we should, my son's grown. So we're talking about, you know, when he was little. Yeah. There were still spankings. Were still okay. Yeah.
Speaker 0 00:22:24 They were far few in between movie. It was
Speaker 2 00:22:26 Absolutely a 0% chance you're gonna ever get a spanking ever. As long as you're telling the truth. And that sucker worked for a long time.
Speaker 0 00:22:33 You know what made me stop showing out in school, uh, with the teachers. I did it all the way up until to, to high school. But I started looking for the one with the right spirit and just saying, man, hey man, I'm a single dad struggle. I'm just trying to get the boy through school. I don't care if he drop out at this point. Uh, and, and I really had that mindset. Uh, and, and I, and I coerced my son in the dropping out when he lost interest in school, when he was in middle school. I said, oh man, it ain't ain't nothing wrong with being a dumb mechanic. Go drop out. So I went in and enroll him in school and let him hang out with me for a week, riding around, doing nothing. Then that next week I will wake him up at five o'clock in the morning and take him to my homeboy mechanic shop and fire his heel and drop him off. Go to work, sir. And come back and get him at five or six o'clock. By the end of that week, he wanted to go back to school
Speaker 2 00:23:24 One day
Speaker 0 00:23:25 He said it didn't feel, he said it didn't feel good. Waking up, doing nothing, sitting around doing nothing. It didn't feel good. So he went and got back in school. Uh, I told him, I don't care if he passed or fail, just go to school and make right choices and decisions and get good citizenship. I don't care about your grades.
Speaker 2 00:23:48 Well, grades will comment from making good choices. And the citizenship means you're paying attention.
Speaker 0 00:23:52 Well, just because you're failing don't mean you're dumb. You're just not interested in what they're trying to teach you. Exactly. He went and learned everything on the job as an excelling in the work world. Yeah. Before he graduated. So I noticed every job he went to, he excelled, got promotions and he never missed work. Well, I'm a guy, go call in and look for every reason in in the world not to get up and go to work. That's the opposite of me. So I would teach him a work ethic. I had him cutting grass early, going to work with my friends because I can't teach him a work ethic. So I would send with my friends who had a job and go, man, they they can show you son. Daddy can't show you. So one day I'm sitting in the office with the principal being an asshole because I'm frustrated and angry as a single father. And, uh, they wanted, they wanted me to do something. And my son heard me tell the principal that I'm a poor single father. My son was probably 11, 12 years old, about to go on the adolescent. But he's starting to come into the knowing of kind of life
Speaker 2 00:25:00 Consciousness. Yeah. Poor
Speaker 0 00:25:02 This generation of kids, hearing that they're poor. We stand in a one bedroom apartment. Me, him and his sister, I'm sleeping on the floor with the sister in the bed. He on the couch. I'm getting food stamps and disability and I'm driving a good times van that my son was ashamed to get dropped off in school then looked like Scooby do. Damn
Speaker 2 00:25:25 Van. Oh man. Those things are awesome. <laugh>
Speaker 0 00:25:27 Like a motherfucker. That's right. Well man, I, I won one now again, a
Speaker 2 00:25:30 Tear drop window. Come on.
Speaker 0 00:25:32 And, and, and that was donated to me by a, a, a Republican candidate, uh, Albert McDaniels, uh, a petroleum engineer. So I'm in here talking to this principal, uh, really wanting to cry, man. Cause I'm, I'm financially messed up. But she heard me, me and my son. When we got to the car, my son looked at me and said, dad, are we really poor materials in his eye? I couldn't even look at him, but I made myself look at him. And I said, yeah, mijo,
Speaker 2 00:26:09 You told 'em the truth. That's hey.
Speaker 0 00:26:10 I said, I said, yeah, uh, that did something to me. Cause I am helping all the kids around the country, man in the facilities, man. Uh, and I can't help my kids. Uh, I can't go get a job cause who gonna be picking 'em up and taking 'em school, getting 'em out. This so I can't even get a job. Cause who go do this. So when I said, yeah, Miho we're really poor, this where the motivation came cuz I didn't know where to get it from. Cause it wasn't in me no more.
Speaker 2 00:26:41 And you saw that he was hurt by that, that this and you didn't appreciate it. But it'ss fascinating to know that this said he didn't even know. Said he didn't even know. He didn't know. I mean, you know, you,
Speaker 0 00:26:51 He looked at me and said, is there anything that you can do about it? He put something off in me when that question, this little boy, 11 year old little boy materials in his eye realizing his daddy is poor. I'm no longer a hero at this point.
Speaker 2 00:27:10 Damn.
Speaker 0 00:27:11 Nah man. When the kids know, but they don't know. They're not supposed to know. Grandmother and muddy and them had 16 kids and them kids never knew they were poor. Cause they never missed a meal. The life stayed on. The house was clean. They never knew.
Speaker 2 00:27:24 Right.
Speaker 0 00:27:26 Kids aren't supposed to be aware. Here it is. He got this awareness and I don't know how to fix this. I don't know how to not be poor other than selling drugs. I dropped outta college to work with kids. I thought this was gonna get me to position that I need. I was go and, and, and I was just a poor man helping kids with no rewards. Seemed like I wasn't looking for rewards. I was looking for a better position in life. Thinking, okay, God, I'm doing right now. Found my purpose. It's get, it's gonna get better. Uh, as many a times I want to go back homie and, and pimp try to play on the bra.
Speaker 2 00:28:06 See, but right then the bag dropped from overhead.
Speaker 0 00:28:10 Well,
Speaker 2 00:28:10 And you have to put on own, put your own mask on first before you can Yeah. Help your son or help anyone else's son. Right. You gotta take care of yourself to know that you're going into these situations. Healthy. The
Speaker 0 00:28:22 Kids said confidence. Is there anything that you can do about it? <laugh>
Speaker 2 00:28:26 That's you know's profound.
Speaker 0 00:28:27 You know what my reply was? Yeah. Miho every day I try to, but I was lying. I was trying to help other kids not help my kids. I didn't know how to ask for money for what I did. So a lot of people use, Hey, come here man, let's do this man, you got some program. Let me see your program. We, we might, so they would get more programs and I would, I was so gullible, I would give 'em the whole programs instead of just snippets of it. So once they get the program, don't hear back from, they go get the,
Speaker 2 00:28:56 They don't need you anymore.
Speaker 0 00:28:57 Hey. But I didn't know.
Speaker 2 00:28:58 I learned that lesson hard too, man.
Speaker 0 00:28:59 I didn't know man. I was, man, I was bright eyed and bushing tails.
Speaker 2 00:29:02 You think everyone's got integrity? Come on now.
Speaker 0 00:29:04 I'm think once you leave the streets and cross over to this side of the street, which is the right side, man. These are good people over here. You can trust everybody man. No man. This is not streets.
Speaker 2 00:29:14 It's a different kinda liar over there,
Speaker 0 00:29:16 <laugh>. So when he said that, man, and my reply was, yeah, every day, uh, I ward within and until I can just find a way to figure it out. And I had to figure it out at this point for him before my daughter to become aware. Uh, so yeah. So, so how that, I mean, how did you end up
Speaker 1 00:29:47 Launching into this? Is that the point where you
Speaker 0 00:29:49 Transitioned into what you're doing now? Well, uh, that's, that's where the start transition. So I, I started trying to, I still have the words of of of, of Bart Lebo, the, the, the executive director of the Annie Casey Foundation. I still have his words ringing in my ear. I still have, um, the, the Baltimore Maryland Jewish attorney who told me, Charleston, you have to figure out a way to become self-sustainable. I still have the words of the white man from the Texas Juvenile Justice Department who said, Charleston, man, you gotta put some business with this. If you don't put no business with your passion, you're gonna get burnt out. Well, people are telling me this, but man, I don't know how. I'm just a passion driven guy to that discovered my purpose and I'm a fool for the purpose. Hey man, Charleston, how much will you charge to do a speaking engagement? Well, I'll do a $500 honorarium fee. Well, man, we just got $150 gas card. Oh, okay. I'll take it. Because I just want to go pour into the children. Yeah, yeah. But I done drove four hours away. <laugh>. Right. You, you see what I'm saying? So yeah, I just wanted to do the work.
Speaker 0 00:30:56 Uh, and, and so I, I told pops, I said, man pops. Well man, I don't, I don't want no money because I'm afraid if I get some money, I still got some street residue in me. I haven't been completely cleansed of the streets. What if I get a bunch of money and quit working with the kids and go back to the streets? So I, I was scared of money to a, to a certain degree because I thought I would go back. Hmm. Uh, I wasn't ready. You didn't think you were ready. I didn't think I was ready, but my heart was in the right place. Every day. I would, I would realign with the purpose. I will redefine in the mirror who I am. So I keep making right choices. And then I leave out the door.
Speaker 1 00:31:45 What's what you going do? What second grade A to make you do? Do what they want, what they want. Blow is the one to see you through. Don't let those biggest take you off you game. Just let lose sit here in the front seat, baby ain't that sweet. Little honey from the, but don't the pool Soul. Soul glory.
